Evolving Your Style, IRL

I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to dress for the life we’re actually living. Not the dreamy version of ourselves. Not the trends we feel pressured to chase. But the version of us that exists right now.

The goal is simple: redefine your personal style so your wardrobe reflects who you are in this season of life — and how you show up in the world.

It started as a pitch to myself. A reminder that my closet needed to align with my real life. And as I’m still doing that work, I realized… why not bring you along with me? Let’s build wardrobes that actually support where we are right now.

I know the saying goes, dress for the woman you want to be, but reality says sometimes it's the space where you are right now that needs to be honored.

For a long time for me, that meant living in athleisure. Transitioning from toddler life to nomad life, comfort wasn’t a choice; it was a necessity.

Then RV life required casual, comfortable dressing. I learned how to elevate workout gear — better sneakers, layered jewelry, a jacket or blazer thrown over the shoulders — just enough to signal effort. Think dressing for a hike at noon and a lunch date shortly after.

And let’s be honest, the pandemic made that look a whole aesthetic.

Now, as I’ve moved beyond the toddler phase and found my rhythm in our nomad lifestyle, I feel ready to show up differently. Day dates with my kid look like lunch followed by a card-trading store. Travel is so threaded into our everyday, it’s easier to know when I need a comfortable outfit — and when I can really put that ish on.

Living in an RV doesn’t allow for excess. My space is limited, which means everything I bring in has to really put in work. It needs to be functional, give me range, and still feel like me. Those restrictions have helped me solidify my sense of style.

This is what evolving your style IRL looks like.

Step 1: Identify the star players in your wardrobe.

Sidenote— I came across this style tip: pick three words that define your style. It’s a simple way to stay consistent when you’re building outfits. It's so simple and it saves me time and energy when getting dressed.

For me, I would say my 3 words are...clean (lines), effortless and soft.

Step 2: Pick 3 words that define your personal style.

Exibit A: A pair of wide leg denim aka The Effortless (Easy) Foundation

Denim always speaks to the easy aspect of my style, because it literally goes with everything. I like to size up in my denim because I want to lean into that relaxed/baggy look. I love it. I can dress it down for a adventure day in the city with the fam, or dress it up for date night with my husband.

Exibit B: A crisp white t-shirt.

I like the more boxy/structured shape on this t-shirt, there's something about an oversized silhouette that feels chic. It works with jeans, layered under a sweater, or even tucked into a mini skirt for an understated night-out look. It's durable and feels like it is meant to live in your closet forever. A white tee like this reflects the clean aspect of my style words.

Closet Staple: A structured white tee is one of the hardest-working pieces in a functional wardrobe.

Another way I'm making my wardrobe more functional– I am leaning into this more– is by accessorizing. I am slowly adding pieces that feel like me. I've realized I'm a silver girl– and my millenial brain still won't let me mix metals. I'm very much a minimalist when it comes to accessorizies, because I truly believe less is more. Knowing this helps me to recognize impulse buys vs pieces that will actually work with what I already have in my closet.

This Rolly bracelet from Revolve, some chic scarfs from the brand, Daïa. It’s amazing how a small tweak can elevate your outfit and create a completely new look. These large dome Celine earrings from Julia Vaughn do all the speaking, I usually don't even have to add any other jewelry when wearing them– besides my wedding stack. It really is the main event.

For a shoe girl like me, this has been the hardest part of curating my wardrobe. I love shoes– heels specifically– but tiny living leaves very little room for collecting. Our very specific lifestyle doesn't allow me to get my cost per wear out of heels, which means versatility has to lead here again.

A kitten heel moves seamlessly from day to night, giving comfort without sacrificing style. A sleek slip-on, like a mule, for those adventure days where you're walking all day. A chic sneaker to throw on with your athleisure wear that says "I may be casual right now, but I know ball". And something for the warmer days when nothing makes sense, but shoes are still required.

Step 3: Invest in accessories– and let them do the work.

The point is everything in my closet has to work, not just once, but over time. Those 3 words serve as a guide, directing how I put looks together and how I shop for pieces that will feel right at home with what I already own.

I'll continue exploring these steps and figuring it out how to build on them, but for now, this feels like a good foundation for maximizing a wardrobe and personalizing it to support the life you're living right now.

I'd love to hear your thoughts– share them with me over on Instagram. Until next time...

-Kondja